Jokes:

5/30/2012

 
1. What did the Tree say to the other Tree? Answer: We are both Trees. 2. Is it good manners to eat fried chicken with your fingers? Answer: No, you should eat your fingers separately. 3. Why do seagulls live near the sea? Answer: Because if they lived near the bay, they would be called bagels.

Worries About Flying:

Two statisticians were travelling in an airplane from LA to New York. About an hour into the flight, the pilot announced that they had lost an engine, but don't worry, there are three left.

However, instead of 5 hours it would take 7 hours to get to New York. A little later, he announced that a second engine failed, and they still had two left, but it would take 10 hours to get to New York.

Somewhat later, the pilot again came on the intercom and announced that a third engine had died. Never fear, he announced, because the plane could fly on a single engine.

However, it would now take 18 hours to get to new York. At this point, one statistician turned to the other and said, "Gee, I hope we don't lose that last engine, or we'll be up here forever!"

Tired of Blonde Jokes...

There once was a blonde who was very tired of blonde jokes and insults directed at her intelligence.

So, she cut and dyed her hair, got a make-over, got in her car, and began driving around in the country.

Suddenly, she came to a herd of sheep in the road. She stopped her car and went over to the shepherd who was tending to them.

"If I can guess the exact number of sheep here, will you let me have one?" she asked.

The shepherd, thinking this was a pretty safe bet, agreed.

"You have 171 sheep," said the blonde in triumph.

Surprised, the shepherd told her to pick out a sheep of her choice.

She looked around for a while and finally found one that she really liked.

She picked it up and was petting it when the shepherd walked over to her and asked, "if I can guess your real hair color, will you give me my sheep back?"

The blonde thought it was only fair to let him try. "You're a blonde! Now give me back my dog."
Andrew
6/1/2012

Haha. Nice jokes! I'm looking forward to more.

Kade
6/1/2012

@Andrew, Thanks!

Carl
6/2/2012

Haha, nice

Kade
6/2/2012

Thanks! :)

Soniku3
6/2/2012

nice jokes!

Kade
6/2/2012

Thanks, which one is your favorite?


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